The lights, the bright colours, overly cheerful people in costumes vying for your attention to shell out money – of course, it’s Christmas. To many, I might sound apathetic, maybe even callous about this supposedly joyous season; this is in fact my issue with this time of year, the forced joy of it all.

I have often found that it’s the most impromptu nights out that you enjoy the most. The most meticulously planned nights out, however, always seem to go wrong – there is so much expectation. It is the exact same with Christmas. There is so much build up and planning that so much more can go wrong, whether it’s for the burnt flat Christmas dinner, or the work night out where half the people won’t be able to make it because of the weather and you’ll end up holding back your friend’s hair for her for most of the night. The almost dictatorial mantra of “I must have fun”, drilled into most people’s heads at this time of year often in actual fact has the exact opposite.

Another reason this joy I’m meant to be filled with doesn’t happen is probably because of the weather – how is anyone supposed to be full of Christmas cheer when they have lost their gloves, are wary for their lives on the slush-filled Edinburgh pavements and their heating has packed in causing ice to form on the inside of their beautiful but ever-so-arctic single glazed flat? Cold weather, and especially living in perpetual darkness, does not for a happy Ms Grinch make. Maybe this is why the pursuit of joy must be done more relentlessly, but when you’re feeling a bit low and all around you are pictures of shiny, happy people showing you how you should in fact be feeling now that the holidays are coming, it can make the whole ordeal even worse.

In spite of all this disappointment I feel with Christmas time, there are some parts of it I love dearly, even if they do have to remain guilty pleasures. I am a complete obsessive for Christmas songs. When I found out She & Him had done a Christmas album I nearly died of excitement, and had it playing loud and proud throughout the whole of November. Now that we have TV in my flat, I keep accidentally leaving it on the music video Christmas countdowns, much to the embarrassment and despair of my flatmates. There is something about a Christmas song that is so tacky it is actually wonderful, and coupled with music videos of hilarious ‘80s haircuts and fantasy Christmas getaways, all log cabins and open fires (yes, I am referring to Wham!), they never cease to fill me with the joy I feel I am somewhat lacking.

Maybe I am just cynical, maybe I am even verging on psychotic for not fully enjoying this time of year. I guess the thing I enjoy most about it is the fact that I get to spend a lot of time with my family. It’s just a shame that family quality time needs to be compartmentalised into this holiday period, instead of being encouraged and given an opportunity for round the year. Especially, when family time comes with tinsel. I hate tinsel.