BFFs: best friends for life, or bad flatmates forever? Kathryn Macphail discusses the ups and downs of flatmates.

Escaping first year halls is always a blessing, especially when it’s to share a flat just like those ones you saw in the 2nd year parties you were amazed by. Perhaps when imagining sharing a flat with friends you picture, well, Friends. Don’t fall for it. This American show, as endearing as it is, is brainwashing you. At times, there seems to be a thin line between being friends and flatmates.

In most cases there is always that one ‘bad’ flatmate. You know the one; they star in all the infamous roommate rants. They seldom do the dishes. They seldom tidy the flat. By the way, have you seen where all your milk has gone? Oh, they’ll pay you back. Maybe.

You could have been moving into somewhere completely ideal, and in your mind the next university year is going to be fantastic. Then, sadly, that fantasy fades. It turns out your ‘friends’ from first year aren’t who you thought they were, and maybe you’re not who they thought you were. They can be spiteful, difficult, and even rather repulsive to live with.

We never question this in first year but in all honesty, how much do we truly know the people we befriend in halls? How true are friendships based on a certain level of superficiality, or partying? The phrase “if you want to know me, come and live with me” certainly springs to mind.

Sometimes we just have to accept that some people are simply unhygienic. Having been molly-coddled for most of their lives, they have little clue as to how to fend for themselves, although I must confess even I didn’t know how to cook pasta before I moved into my own flat. Most people will have their annoying habits that drive you up the wall, but is it any reason to suffer heart palpitations over? Maybe some people just cannot live together, full stop.

It is more than likely that your flatmate is not going to change, but there’s no harm in trying a few solutions. Try acting even more disgusting than them, however revolting the lengths you may have to go. Go mad. Don’t do the dishes, if you don’t feel like it. Maybe you should eat their food. That’s right, everything and anything. Go for it. They probably owe you several loaves of bread - at least - and there’s always the possibility of paying them back, when you get round to it that is.

Perhaps if this insanitary, germ-infested flatmate was a stranger, it could be easier to give them the heave-ho. When the foul flatmate is a best friend, it gets a bit more complicated. As loveable as they are, there might be a murder rap soon.

Another horrible situation that can arise is exclusion. The flat is meant to be your home for the next few years, presumably, and your friends are now family, but for some unfathomable reason they start point blank ignoring you; unfortunately bullying or ‘cliques’ don’t end in high school.

So what to do? There is always the option of staying; fair enough, it is just a flat and there are no rules to say that your flatmates have to be your best friends. It may not be the Friends situation everyone deluded themselves it would be, but it has allowed you to socialise more, as you might want to be anywhere else but your flat.

If your roommate survival guide tips were all completely ineffective and you’re actually considering an escape to living with the parents for the rest of your life, then it could be worth taking the chance and ditching those flatmates. Yes, the fun of flat hunting begins again, with the added bonus and likelihood of your flatmates accusing you of betrayal. Should you care? No. If you’re unhappy, you’re better off without them. Move on to pastures new. Through trial and error you’ll find that right flat eventually. Your second family.