So here we are, a mere three weeks into 2010, and the world media already afire with vitally important news related to science and technology. No, not that scientists have mapped the genetic structure of the plant most effective against malaria; that pales with insignificance against the fact that Ron Jeremy, the world’s most unlikely and yet successful porn star, has stated that computer games are worse for children than pornography.

Had a more computer-savvy follower ascended Mount Horeb to receive the Ten Commandments, they would have come back down with 11. And it would have read in the Book of Tech: “Thou shalt not buy an operating system upon its day of release”, and then in harshly chiselled characters, “especially from those bastards at Microsoft.”

Many people were probably too busy to notice Gordon Brown’s apology on behalf of the free world for the ‘appalling’ treatment of Alan Turing, World War II codebreaker and the daddy of computing and AI. The many thousands of scientists, historians and students who signed the petition that prompted it, however, were not. The apology comes 57 years after Turing’s arrest and castration for being homosexual, but just who was Alan Turing?

Recently, Courtney Love signed up Kurt Cobain to appear in the new Guitar Hero (we’re up to number five for those keeping count) as a playable character for any song in the game. So now your sick dream of having the tortured Nirvana frontman singing Bon Jovi’s 'You Give Love a Bad Name' can finally be fulfilled. As Love shamelessly whores out her dead husband, you can’t help but smile when you hear that Yoko Ono told Harmonix - developers of The Beatles: Rock Band - that the rooftop concert at the end wasn’t windy enough. This game is a product of pure, bubble-wrapped fan love.

As the title may suggest, Halo 3: ODST is not a true sequel; rather it is a pseudo-prequel that presents a twist to the typical Halo experience. Rather than playing the series’ iconic cyborg super-soldier Master Chief, you play as a mere mortal, albeit an ODST. For those unfamiliar with the term, ODST stands for Orbital Drop Shock Troopers. Essentially, they are the equivalent of the SAS in space.